MY LEARNINGS

Hello Friends,

I would like to share something little philosophical or life-related advice here. The reason to post this is that I have a habit to watch/read a lot on these subjects and they hover on the mind most of the time. It’s also a quest to ponder on some difficult questions I think about life in general and what could make it worthwhile. This piece is a living document and I would like to add to it as I go along (or maybe create few others – I don’t know). But to have these fleshed out in print gives me an opportunity to visit it whenever my mind unconsciously starts pondering our these matters.
There is also a lot of material on this which I have left out but I consider that as a stepping stone towards a better understanding.

I will try my best to follow and implement them in my life.

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• From ex-monk Dandapani (summarizing the learnings):
  • How do we get happiness?

                     HAPPINESS

• • By living the right lifestyle.

                     RIGHT LIFESTYLE → HAPPINESS

• • How do we know what is the right lifestyle?

                     CLARITY / PRIORITIES → LIFESTYLE

• • How do we have clarity or work on the priorities in life?

                     PURPOSE → CLARITY

• • How do we find our purpose?

                     Thinking with at least 5 min eyes closed every day → PURPOSE

• • Also so how do we work/do the task which are priorities in life?

                     AWARENESS → WORK ON PRIORITIES

• • How do we get awareness?

                     Practice AWARENESS IN OTHER TASKS

                     DURING THE DAY → MORE AWARENESS IN LIFE TO DO PRIORITY TASKS

 

• We need to find our “purpose” or “mission”. Otherwise, our “priorities” in life will always be messed up. If so, we would tend to concentrate/spend our “awareness” on the wrong things in life. This leads to a “lifestyle” whose by-product is not “happiness”. E.g. Retired Navy Seal and author Jocko Willink have this to say about veterans returning home from duty (paraphrased here)  – “When they were in the army, they had a mission. After retirement, some are not able to cope because now there is none. Hence, they need to determine what their next mission in life is.”

 

• We need to close our “eyes” and think hard as to determine what our “mission” is in immediate or long term future. There has to be something to look forward to. The mission could be something which could be done in a few days or months or years. It could be a single mission or a mix of something big and a few small ones. Whatever it is, your “day” has to revolve around this “mission”.

 

• I feel having a “mission” or “purpose” determines what your “priorities” for the day would be. So you could start “prepping” or “preparing” for this mission or priorit(y)/(ies) much ahead in advance (hours, day, days before). E.g. Sachin Tendulkar would iron his clothes/jersey the night before all his matches from beginning to end of his career. This would let his subconscious mind get into the “zone” and he would think of the upcoming match, bowlers and other things in advance. You cannot wake up at 9 for a 9.30 match. Same is true for life. You are good at anything (good/bad) which you have been “practicing” for a long time.

 

• You need to get your life (financially, relationships, spiritually, work) and your family’s in order first. Only then you can serve others (social service, helping others, volunteering, giving back).

What makes him tick – Akshay Kumar

Anupam Khar recently interviewed Akshay Kumar as part of a new series on Republic channel. It was a pleasure listening to this. Some of the interesting bits I found are below.

When asked about prayers/religion, Akshay replies that he is no overtly religious and has no special time for prayers. He chants while exercising (working with dumbells in the pool) so rather than looking elsewhere he has his attention to the ritual. Does not sit well with whole Mindfulness concept, but what a way to multitask!

The memory of his deceased father (whom he gives all credit for his success) he recollects was during his childhood days when his Dad used to bathe him and pour the whole bucket of water on him slowly while chanting Om Navashiva. Liked the way he says that it used to feel that the water flow will never end and Akshay too has done same with his Kid. It might have been a way to connect a bond with the higher power and also amongst the family at the same time. A great way to carry the values ahead in your next generation.

Anupam asks about Akshay’s “start of the day” rituals. It seems he wakes at 4 (sleeps at 9 daily) and gives himself 30min to 1 hr in the morning to sit with himself and think/read. Then exercise (outdoors/pool in summer and gyms in winter) and by 8, he is ready. Inspirational!

When asked about his working hours, Akshay says he does not work more than 8 hours a day (he being the producer now has the authority to exert this rule) because he needs rest of the time for family, exercise, and sleep. Simple schedule and consistent.

His weakness – Sweets. After meals. (Me too)

On having earned enough wealth now and being secured financially – Akshay gives a nice analogy about how he knows his earnings are enough for the lifetime and hence he now wants to help others around. “During flight turbulence, when the oxygen masks drop, you correctly secure one on yourself first and ONLY then the person to your next”. Same with life and wealth.

On Competition – “Don’t do what the masses do because when you go after the masses, the “m” gets silent” – funny line but he insists (and advises his son too) on creating a UNIQUE path of your own with consistent and hard work. Looking at the huge number of his films doing well now and mostly not having worked with BIG directors as compared to his now and past contemporaries, it sure seems he follows this advice.

 

 

Tamasha (movie) – A lot lies beneath the surface

Since there are a lot of thoughts and musings listed here, let me get something straight out of the bat about this movie. Tamasha, staring Ranbir Kapoor and Deepika Padukone, released in 2015 is not a big commercial hit neither is much praised by the critics. It did average business at the box-office. I think the film has its flaws (one of them being it would be better suited for Ved/Ranbir to end up being an actor since he play acts in Corcisa; an aspiring story teller would not do that). It tries to bite a lot more than it can chew and digest. But there are lot of ideas brewing under the surface of this beautiful looking film which at the outset or before its release looked like a sure-fire blockbuster staring A-list actors. But it turned out to be lot deeper for mere entertainment. We can see Tamasha not as a “deep” film but as a movie struggling to deal with deeper ideas. It could have been better and the concepts could have been better realized but nevertheless is struggling to say something important.

Story summary:

This is story of Ved (Ranbir) and his journey in life. The only other character worth a mention here is that of Tara (Deepika). She is the catalyst in his story. The story in short can be summarized as this – A marketing executive, Ved who is a silent type and chained to a routine (work) life takes off to a vacation to Corsica, France. Here he meets Tara and he suddenly puts forth an idea of play acting with her while on the island. They play exuberant characters from 70’s hindi film era (he as “Don” and she as “Mona Darling”). She compliments and plays along but eventually falls for him. When they return home, he dials back to his real personality but Tara is hounded by his love. She traces him and upon getting together, they kindle a relationship. But she is surprised to see the once free spirited Ved exists no more and in place is a boring, 9 to 5 corporate guy which is not what she desired. Later she rejects his proposal in public. He is devastated to know the reason that she is looking for someone who he is not and who does not exist. But this touches a nerve in him and he embarks on a journey of self discovery.

I found lot of interesting life nuggets in it which I have managed to share below.

Other side:

Tamasha talks about exploring yourself, looking deep within to check if there is an “other” side to us. Are were so high-jacked by our mundane lives that we tend to forget to ruminate and look inside? This happens to Ved. When he botches up at this work place by misbehaving with his boss, he is let go. He spends months without a job and during this period his introspection begins. He knows something within is amiss but he just does not know what it is. It is that feeling when a person realizes that his/her current identity is not what they are. He is someone else and Ved’s frustration arises from the fact he does not what is it he is “missing”.

 

Trapped:

Ved is “trapped” in his routine. The movie shows his daily routine right from the time he is up in the morning. The sequence remains the same as is for almost all of us. Only a few mortals amongst us dare to be different and there is a dynamism and randomness to the way their days start and shape up. He is unlike the Don who Tara meet at Corcisa and hence when they first start to share a kiss on reuniting after few years, he excuses himself to take off his wrist watch first lest it become a hindrance in the act. Tara realizes he is become so clinical in his actions. For Ved, he always was like this.

Search:

Ved knows he needs something else in his life. His corporate job is not “that”. But he does not know how and where to find it? He cruises through his days without actively looking for it. He likes telling stories and act them out in front of a crowd but still cannot put a finger on what he wants. Sometimes, people wander through the wastelands of their daily chores without even realizing the things they are searching are actually there in the open eye, figuratively and sometimes literally. Ved is back at his hometown and then he decides to visit the old story teller he used to listen to during his childhood days. He finds the guy is still around, much older and needs support to move. Ved asks him innocently about his (Ved’s) story and what he is missing in his life? The guy is taken aback and then lashes out with, “mujhe kya poochta hai? Apne aap se pooch tu kya chahhta hai apne life se.”. This is the eureka moment, the illumination, the answer to his puzzle. The song “Safarnama” (the saga of my journey) which follows sees Ved cruising along in the town like a free bird discovering freedom and kissing the air along the flight. He is estatic with the realization that he himself holds the key to his happiness and it is his decision to do what he feels like in life. The lyrics say it all, “jisse doondha zaamane main, mujhe main tha, Safarnama..”

 

Storytelling:

There were some interesting footnotes throughout the movie. The storyteller reprimands a young Ved when the child questions him that the old fellow is mixing up his stories and the characters. The oldie replies with, “Bas kahaani ka maaza lo”. It does not matter which character belong to what story and whether the story line is different from the original one. What matters is that you should be enjoying the story told in the moment. So is it important to enjoy the story told or whether we should correct it for the accuracy and get entitled to the right one? What is more important? What do we do in our lives when we tell stories to others? It could be our tale or someone we know. Is it okay if it is modified for effect or should we stick to the original?

Real world?:

For Ved, Corcisa is a much needed release. Maybe for the first time, he gets to live as someone else for a few days and he is content with it. He realizes that he is capable of doing different things. So this begs the question – who is the real Ved? The one who is stuck in the corporate life in Delhi or the Don who is living life on his own terms. In which life is Ved acting and where is close to his core? Of all the roles Ved plays or would eventually play in his life, which one of the above two is closer to the real Ved? Do we too have such a schism in our lives? Do we act more in some roles and are closer to ourselves in others?

 

Tara:

What is Tara’s role in Ved’s transformation? Her rejection of him puts the first nail in the coffin as far as his current persona is concerned. It was the pain of the denial that triggers his outbursts but it takes him time to finally know that the emotion seeking to break free within him was not his “love” for Tara but his “love” for something more important in his core, his passion in life. His likely schizophrenic responses were his two disparate personalities responding in tandem but the outpour was always on Tara. She was the one who is taking it all in and consuming the side effects of his inner turmoil since only she figured out the real Ved like only she can. Another beautiful moment in the film is at the right end where we see Ved who has finally found himself. He has become a storyteller and stages shows for a live audience now. After the thundering ovation he receives after his group’s possibly first stage performance, he hat tips to Tara who is at the sides watching. Then he pushes ahead towards her and gets down on his four when close to Tara. This is not just someone cuddling towards the loved one after getting acknowledged for their achievements but it is something else. He realizes these accolades coming his way today belong to her actually as she was the one who saw through his past self.  He took a long time to find “himself” which she had already done earlier. In that essence, out of them, she becomes the greater artist in his eyes. What a great realization that his “love” ultimately becomes the beacon or the “Tara” for his “life”.  She too found her “Don”. They seal these bubbling emotions with a kiss.

The Day I almost Escaped

 “The Day I almost escaped”

“Things are going as per the plan. I just wish I can get away and not get caught. This island seems to have a magic of its own. How on earth is this possible? An island at the far south west of Europe where I can tend to my duty without much hassles. Let me be careful with the bag though. Someone should be lurking around here in this lavish compartment of the Riverland local.” She drew her hand mirror from her purse and cross checked that it would be difficult for them to recognize her. Suddenly,

“Is that dude with that hat starting at me? If yes, I need to be careful. Yes, he is tilting his head a little and seems he might be just nod to his fellow companion. I need to move quick.”

Kim left her window seat and marched ahead towards the compartment door on the opposite side. She furtively glanced back to check the position of the hat. He was absent from the location she last spotted him. He now seemed to be in her line of sight across the window. She saw the train approaching the next station – Willerdale. The compartment doors were yet not split open but she managed to squeeze herself out onto the platform.

“Let me not look back. Let the door slam shut again and lock him in. I cannot afford to get caught. Let me dash onto pathway outside there after parting through the flock of humans around.”

She breezed through without looking back and took the underground route to get across the road. She was searching for something like a tourist without a map. She finally found it after alighting on the other side. Royal Willerdale Museum stood by the wayside in all its pristine legacy. It seemed old now from the rough edges and the dull fading paint at the center. Having confirmed no human being noticed her, she ventured in fully aware of the fact that if she was spotted there it would be difficult to escape from the historical building. She stared at the monuments at the entrance as if trying to search something in it. The Tyrannosaurus Rex looked menacing enough for a child to recollect for years to come. She also noticed there were new artifacts at the place. Having spent enough time at the place, it was time for her to move on. She thought this must have been a pleasant enough diversion for her pursuer to get lost in the trail.

She exited by the backside of the museum and arrived at the center of the Willerdale city park which is an open space covered by paving stone and house plants. The fountain at the center attracts a lot of visitors who stroll and spend relaxed afternoon sojourns especially during the weekends. Kim stood by the base of the fountain and had a good look around. She was particularly interested in the young couple who seemed to be so much in love that for them the world around did not exist. They seem to be knowing each other for long but she wished if they had just met. The romanticism of the magical surroundings of the place called for young fluttering hearts to converge. She sighed as if she was holding on to a wish. The bird bath near the fountain seem to be tending to an assorted mix of feathers and wings. She seemed lost in the moment when her eye caught the suited guy with the fedora again. He seemed to have found her again.

They both stood still, each sensing who would make the next move. She took the lead and waded through the tourists at the south side exit. This time she saw the young lad seated at the bench towards the entrance staring at her. She passed him by a whisker and he made an attempt to shift from his static position to follow her.

“Damn, they are all in this together. I need to get in another vehicle now since I would be out chased on the foot.” She motioned for a taxi on the other side of the road but it took forever to arrive. For her, even the moments between seconds mattered; that taxi be damned. The Galaxy Star mall loomed large from her view. Without thinking much, which would ultimately seal her escape, she dashed towards the mall. Having ushered in, she looked for exits first. This time she saw a familiar face following her. There was no way she now could escape. She somehow managed to take the busy lane of shoppers. Wading through the sea of faces, she was dazed already and clueless to what was happening. She had lost all sense of directions and there was no way she could make it out now. Alas, she landed herself on the same spot from where she started in the center of the huge building in the full view.

They all seemed now spread in different directions and at varied distances away from her. They started to sprint towards her. She knew she had to take care of them one at the time.

“But which one should be the first one? Which one of them needs to be faced initially? They are approaching towards me. Maybe the fedora chap should be taken out of his misery first.” She reached for her purse waiting for the first strike. As expected, the suited gentleman was first to arrive at arm’s length and she made the move and drew the instrument from her purse.

“Here you go, mister.”

Her sharp nosed ink pen was ready for the first autograph of the day. He arrived armed with a notepad. Soon the other pursuers gathered for the same. She attended to them in a jiffy as if to get rid of them once for all. But the curiosity spread in the mall. Onlookers looked puzzled. Slowly the realization dawned and few other species of Indian origin begin to arise from the crowd. The expressions on their face seemed to be a mix of surprise shock and overbearing amusement, as if they discovered their Lord arose from amongst the mere mortals in the flock.

“Let me knock them one at a time.”

The familiar faces now were on phone calls and all of a sudden, the media vehicle bells could be heard.

“I can see the heavy equipment, the stands, the camera and the other heavy duty stuff. The faces do not matter now as I know the barrage of questions would gobble up my remaining day.”

They marked the place by the corner and installed the setup there. And then she was requested to step in the lighted corner for what seemed to be an unofficial round of interview. The familiar faces, who were actually the assistants on her film set, seem to intervene with the media spoke person but they eventually worked out something. The chief assistant of hers approached her and whispered. He alerted her not to disclose any of the work details of her crew and the film.

“Q: Miss Kim, how does it feel to have a day for yourself as an anonymous person?

A: Fame comes at the cost of anonymity for us. Fortunately, I could enjoy the freedom till someone came back to remind me of my reality. He chased me down real good, I bet. But there is another larger reason to my madness today.

Q: That’s interesting, we will come to it later. This European island does not have a large Indian diaspora. Still India and Indian films have a special place in the hearts of the fans here. Some of them are gathered here to see one of their favorite actress. How do you feel about being in the city here?

A: I feel elated and proud that our film industry has a fan base with a such worldwide spread. I personally feel this city has such a romantic charm which is particularly hard to shake off. Did I already mention it is also jaw droopingly beautiful.

Q: So do you have someone special accompanying you here?

A: Sorry to disappoint. There is no such person with me here.

Q: Okay, so what brings you here as we see it is not a personal vacation or something of that sort?

A: Yes, you are right. We are shooting for a film here but sorry to say, I cannot divulge any further details please.

Q: That’s alright Miss Kim. Do you have any special bond with this city? Does this city mean anything more to you than just an exquisite tourist locale?

A: Yes actually. This is somewhat personal. This is not the first time I am visiting here. I accompanied my Dad here in the year 2000. We were on a vacation and he wanted me to visit all the specific spots throughout the city.

Q: Any special reason he showed you around this place? Was it part of the vacation plan or something?

A: Only since you asked, let me share more. That fountain in the center of the park. That is exactly where my parents first met. My mother was a Britisher who had been on a vacation here and then she met this charming, young Indian fellow who was working on the film set here. They were shooting a travel documentary. It was a rare thing in those days. She was in the city for few days and a casual chat about the Victorian architecture of that place started it all. The fountain was their daily meeting spot during those days.

Q: That is a wonderful story you shared. Was it the reason you planned to travel alone today without informing your fellow crew mates? Were you reliving those moments?

A: Yes. I am overwhelmed. This is something I always wanted to do but rarely got any opportunity all these years. Fortunately, my film has some portions to be shot here and I got to come here. I wanted to relive all these places my Dad took me to show how they met and places they saw. Sorry Akash, I had to elope today.

Q: Nothing to complain here about our little abode, but we do have a lot of pick pocketeers here, nothing to worry much. You should have been careful since this is a tourist place.

A: I know. I was well informed hence I clutched my purse all the time. I have some family mementos which I dare not lose anyhow.

Q: This is from this lovely young lady here. Can you pass on the mike to her?

Q: Hello Kim madam. This is Clarie here. I am a big fan of you and your movies. I wanted to ask – Is this the best birthday gift you ever had? (Clarie chuckled and the audience hooted). Is there any other place you still wish to cover today in the city?

A: Yes. My dear. I am the lucky girl today. And a ‘No’ to the other question. I am so happy today to actually cover everything I planned. I know my folks are smiling from someplace above.

Q: And just like your parents do you wish to find your soul mate here? (More hooting)
A: That is enough. Kim needs to be rest now as we have a grueling shoot ahead of us. Thank you all for the love and warmth you have showered on Miss Kim. She would be in the city for few more days. I sincerely wish for your support and co-operation. (Akash, her film director, intervened)

A: Thanks everyone. Have a great day. (Kim buzzed)

Some question loomed large over Kim. She seemed to be smirking. Akash thought it must be the last one. Secretly, he wished himself to be the one for her. He had admired her for long.

Meanwhile, for Kim, it was the other question that triggered something.

“Only if you guys knew. Today is Wednesday. Yes, that makes it 3 days from now. The moron with the hat started it all and it came to all this. Otherwise I had plans for the entire day Goddamit. But no worries, by the way did I mention to you that my parents had their first kiss by the lakeside towards the end of the Sesame street in pale moonlight. :)……”

Akash appeared puzzled now. She smirked again.

Interstellar – last scene revised (2014 movie)

Interstellar – Last scene (my revised take)

[Cooper – Lead character; Murph – Cooper’s daughter; Tom – Cooper’s son; Brand – Professor Brand’s daughter and his team mate on the intergalactic journey]

Narrative wise, the sci-fi aspects have been dealt with at this point in the movie and this is the moment the entire movie is working towards on the emotional front. The entire movie is pivoted against this central emotional conceit that the lead character has to go through the journey with the hope that one day he will see his daughter again.

(Cooper is rescued. He is now under treatment in a hospital facility in Cooper planet currently orbiting Saturn. The planet is named after his last name as a testimony to the ground breaking work his daughter Murph performed and role she played in rescuing humans from earth. After getting discharged, he visits the home which is similar to his on earth and which now houses some old stuff he used earlier. He is told that his daughter is due for arrival in 2 days once she knew he was found).

Cooper visits the facility where Murph is supposed to be under observation after she is transferred to Cooper planet. He thinks she must not be keeping well lately. It has been a long, long time now since he has last seen his child. Cooper cannot fathom the excitement he is undergoing now. He is becoming queasy with the thought itself. The usher at the reception notices Cooper and asks “Sir, she is waiting for you on the first floor in the room towards the end of hallway to the right.”

Cooper advances to the room. He passes by an old lady sitting in the waiting area outside the room. He nods to her and proceeds to the door of the room. He stands still outside unable to knock. He gasps. Looks back towards the lady outside and coils a bit to hide the excitement. He knocks at the door. With no response, he enters the room. There seems to be no one there. He walks in slowly and his gaze falls upon the photo frames decked by the bed side. He has indeed entered the right room. There is just one picture of him with a young Murph and Tom. There is another one of Murph with Tom’s family and then one with professor Brand. He wells up at the very thought of how long it has been that he has seen his family. His perception of time has now been altered. There is no word of Tom yet and he will have to search for him. But at least he has found Murph. He wonders if she is younger to him in age.

There is a knock at the door. A nurse ushers in and Cooper inquires her about Murph.

“Did you not see her on the way, Mr. Cooper?”, the nurse is puzzled.

“No. I didn’t. Is she out somewhere?”

“Sir, she is waiting for you in the area outside”, she remarks.

Cooper’s heart skips a beat. “My daughter is the old lady. I mean, is this possible? Oh yes, she saved the world with my help and a hell lot of time must have elapsed.”

He nudges along outside the room and watches Murph starring at him. “Oh yes, she is my kid. The same gleam in the eye.”

He slowly walks towards her, shocked and unsure of how to react. Her wrinkled face now looks familiar. Her eyes welcome him first and then

“Hello , dad! I was waiting for a long, long time.”

“Mmm…Murph.”

“Yes, dad. Its me. I am 104 now. Stroke of fate.”

“I cannot.. Its so nice to see you, Murph”, Cooper gives in. He is crying now.

“Do not cry for me, dad. I have lot of people now who would do that for me.”

“How did you know I would come back?”

“Because you told me so. You had promised.”

He hugs her. He is not sure he remembers the touch of his daughter from the past when they embraced.

“I do not know how to react. It is so surreal. It seemed to me like eternity in space that I struggled in space to get back to you. Now I do not want to lose you.”

“Do not have much time, dad.” Murph declares.

A group of people hurdle around. Murph introduces Cooper to his family, his grand and great grand children. Cooper just stares at these strangers and cannot come up with anything other than a cold hello.

Cooper goes, “Oh wow, this other dimension time shit just got better of me. Now I am ancestor to you all.”

He turns to Murph. “I would not leave you now. I promise again.”

“Things change. People change. Priorities also. I do not have much time, dad. You do. There are things you can still achieve. You kept your end of the bargain to me. Now you need to move ahead. My family will be there with me. Also Tom is dead long time ago. Sorry for telling you this. There is lot of work for you to do now. Brand… you need to go get her. Maybe your journey starts again.”

“I will not leave you, Murph…”

“You need to. The world is safer now but not much long. Go dad, I can die in peace now. I could not have dreamt of a better sleep.”

Meanwhile on planet Edmund, Brand is harvesting the human embryos in tents. This could be the future of the human civilization, she wonders staring at them in distance. But she is alone and longs for company. Maybe someone will come along. Till then, she decides to trudge along with her duty.

Cooper realizes the world has moved on. His emotional world, Murph too has moved on. Are we bound by our relationships? Are relationships themselves bound by time? If so, then can time alter them? This time shit again, he muses and then steps out of the hospital. He watches the warped sky in the distance into the horizon, stares upwards and says “I am coming for you, Brand.”

“Junior”

Red and cherry like were you when you first opened your eyes,
The day the world welcomed you and heard the squeaky cries.
We were earlier called husband and wife,
And you promoted us to dad and mother.

We thanked the God for the gift he sent,
But we were worried your were so delicate.
From the other world you came to our place,
So pure, bright and immaculate was your face.

Your every tear would make us little hurt and sad,
Your every smile would melt the very heart and we feel glad.

Your persistent cries choke our every breath and we sigh,
But then your incessant laughter lifts our spirits that high.

You are such a symbol of purity and innocence,
Wish you could share it with the world in existence.

Looking at you, I now can see how my past might have been,
When I was a baby like you but recollect nothing I had seen.

Dread the day which I know is surely going to come,
When your feathers will spring and you will fly alone.
But till then, this time I have with you to give and care,
Not a single moment of my love I would miss to share.

AUTOPSY OF A MODERN MARRIAGE

A scintillating read, a delicious thriller about the autopsy of a modern marriage.

Warning: Some minor spoilers could be found or can be implied from the review below.

What is it about?

“Exactly how well do you know your spouse?” – that’s the introspective question fleshed out by the novel. Do we know the past of the person sleeping next to us. Even if we do, can we say we know the exact thought process of this person. Since thought drives behaviour so is behaviour we see a sham or a manipulation? A lot of such discussions become the breeding ground in which the characters in the novel thrive. Themes like guilt, deception, manipulation etc. become commonplace in one such marital relationship (between Nick and Amy Dunne).

The basic plot goes like this – Amy goes missing on their fifth wedding anniversary and Nick is clueless. They both are writers who moved back to Nick’s hometown (Missouri) from New York due to the recession. They were so much in love back when they met and now all is evaporated in thin air. But what exactly happened to Amy? Is Nick involved? Is everyone’s suspicion of Nick justified as its normally the husband involved in such cases (that is what the pulp thrillers have taught us over time)?

What makes it so different from the rest?

This is one of the best written novels I have ever read in a long time. Three things nudge this one to top echelon of today’s best sellers.

1. superlative quality of writing. The details of the way these characters think and feel is finely fleshed out. The audience rarely seem to be worn out with a lot of internalization. We bounce back like ping pong balls between the perspectives of the lead couple. Her choice of words and phrases at various points is very effective.

2.subject matter : The plot sounds refresh and will resonate with lot of people. The story is pulpy and it belongs to genre fiction. It is a part thriller part whodunit (which are commonly read) but what makes it kind of unique it is that it set in a relationship milieu.

3.story telling structure: A unique approach where the entire story is spilled through first person narratives of the two lead characters. What they observe and feel is what we get. Amy has her journal entries which informs the reader of her thought process and experiences and Nick recounts the happening in the current day investigation.

What is the reader takeaway from this?

A lot of themes are tossed up: What truth do we want to hear in any relationship? The hard one or the convenient one. And what about the need to end arguments with our own ways. Do we have the last say in them or do we allow our partners to close the heated dialogue? If we need our loved ones to be on their best behavior, what should be we do? Let them be and hope they change or else take action?

Another crucial plot point is manipulation. It could be with your spouse, your loved ones or even how we can play with the media or vice versa. It could be lethal or sometimes benign. Again there is a more direct way of manipulating others and sometimes subtle. Maybe everyone does it with every other being. That is one of the subliminal points put across in the story.

GONE GIRL – THE MOVIE

A decent thriller with standard direction but missing the several beats of the novel.

To those who have not read the novel?

The story will draw you in and since there is lot of ground to cover in about 2+ hours, the pace of the movie is brisk. Also David Fincher, being of the acclaimed directors of “dark” thrillers is perfect fit for such a subject. Having directed the likes of “seven”, “fight club”, “social network” and numerous heavy thrillers, he displays his trademark touches in few spots. Look out for the scenes in Desi’s getaway home towards the end of the movie – there is a lot of tension and style there.

To those who have read?

The story moves fast but without the impact it has in the novel. Yes, movies based on novels tend to skim through few parts quickly or completely chop others, but here it is a case of lot of things happening but without convincing motivations for those who care to think about. The characters and the situations need some space to breathe. The novel allows us to get in the head of the characters, but the movie voice overs do not help much. Also the actions of the protagonists are much better realized in the novel.

Another crucial aspect to note is that apart from the aforementioned scenes and some not-so-important chunked out parts from the novel, the director does not impress much. Much of what happens is flat. The story has the hook but the execution does not!

Final take:

Read the novel. It does much better service to the pulpy story. Some parts may be far fetched in the plot, but overall this popular novel stands much above the rest of its peers. The stage is set, some strings are pulled, the audience is baited and a game of guilt and manipulation is set afoot.

SCARred!!

 

The living area had turned into a battleground of sorts. Keith was teeming with anger.

“I need to teach him a lesson. He is an ass.” he blurted. Albert had already been privy to his son’s outbursts earlier but he knew they were rare and something serious had happened. He comforted him “Keith, mind your language. Where did you learn these words?? We belong to a cultured family.” Keith asserted, “He deserves it”. Albert felt sad and puzzled.

“Also let me remind you he is an elderly person. Promise me you will never talk back else be prepared for a nice pasting”. Keith flared even further. ” To hell with OLD. If he is one, why does not he behave like one? What authority he has to treat me like this. Also I am not afraid of your beating anymore. I am big enough. You all behave the same. Go to hell!”. Keith stormed out of the room. He quickly assembled his cricket kit for the practice session that evening. “That’s it. I will teach him a lesson today.”

Ganesh was at his regular duties for the day. He slowly puffed another shot from whatever little was left of the bidi. His attention was fixed to an old copy of Bollywood daily while he worked up the buttons on the lift and serviced the patrons. Hrishkesh Apartments stood alongside the hustle bustle of a fish market area which was quite well known around. It was an old, dilapidated building which had housed few families from generations. On the eight floor, the door sprang open and Ganesh saw the young lad with his gear ready to hop in. Keith pushed himself in with a tinge of fear on finally approaching this dark portly man. The huge scar on the right side of his face now made him look like a monster in close-up.

“I…” Silence. Keith struggled. “I want to ask you something.”

“Why..Why do we behave badly with me always? You never do the same with Ayansh, Suraj anyone for that matter. It’s always me.”

“I fear coming into the lift every time. Last week when you shouted at me when my bat accidently hit the buttons, I was scared. My friends secretly chuckled. I got less marks in the test the next day because I could not concentrate on maths. None of the trigonometry problems made sense. There was no reason that my behaviour resulted in such treatment. You are a big bad person. You are the worst person I have ever known. From the time you have come to this building, these last 2 months have been hell. I have complained to my parents already and they are going to take care of you.”

His thoughts muddled up. “Please do not do such things to me. I am a good boy and have not done anything wrong to anyone.” Ganesh saw him rushing out. He ran covered with fear. Keith came onto the road, dazed. He was trembling but was relaxed knowing all the shitty thoughts he had over the weeks were finally out. He at least had the courage to face the devil.

Mr. Khanna saw the scene when he waiting for the lift on the ground floor. He followed Keith and grabbed him outside. After knowing the story, he knew he had to take care of this situation before other society members start confronting him. He was the society secretary for 10 years.

Within an hour, he managed to assemble key members of the society group along with Albert and Keith’s mother. The matter was scrutinized for some time and everyone was shocked with this happening for weeks. The decision was made. Ganesh was summoned. He requested that he needs a chance to explain but only to Keith’s parents.

“What possibly do you have to defend yourself?  You prove that you come from an uncivilized society.” blurted Albert.

“I am very sorry. I am selfish and needy. Let me pour myself why I did that which truly is appalling.” Ganesh was teary eyed. “It has to do with my son. Amar was never an obedient child. He grew up with us always wanting to prove to the world that he deserved much more than rot in such an impoverished family and society. He was.. ashamed of us. He grew up to be quite successful and moved to a far by apartment which was unique for a chawl boy. He used to visit us though but then he became much calmer as he grew up. He understood that he had achieved whatever he needed to and we were not to blame for the past. He became cold to us. His visit became rare though he sends us some money to take care of few necessities. His mother died few years back. She secretly wanted Amar to spend more time with her but then he used to be always busy. We could not manage to ask him. There was a lull in our lives and she passed away wishing something would change.”

His eyes welled with tears now.

“I am strong. I managed without him. But for past few weeks, I somehow wanted your kid to speak to me. I know I am a dark skinned person. The scar from my childhood makes it worse. Kids used to call me “Rakshas”. I wanted to be friends with Keith but I know my face and appearance would terrify him. I know he cannot talk to me in a friendly tone. I was desperate. I missed my child. My child used to yell at us for various reasons. We never reprimand him much. We secretly liked it. At least he was talking to us. I missed that a lot. I wanted Keith to shout at me. Say something. That is the reason why I behaved like that. Today I feel relieved but also sad for Keith. I know this cannot be pardoned easily.”

“But why our child? You targeted just him.” Albert heaved.

“Yes. It’s a stroke of coincidence. Keith looks exactly how my son used to look in his child hood days. Even the way he lashed at me was the same. I just could not stop myself to get him to talk to me with him any which way. People do not get friendly with dark scarred people like me frequently.” Ganesh welled up.

It stirred Albert and he seemed to be less angry all of a sudden.

Still Ganesh was let go of his duties in that society. That loss was nowhere close to the fulfilment he received. He knew he would get another job. He was selfish indeed but needed closure. We win some, we lose some.  For Ganesh, catharsis prevailed.

ON & ON..

When I woke up I saw all day and no night,
The world was so good and everything was bright.
Then came the night and darkness fell upon,
It seemed these times will go on and on.

I saw my loved ones helping me to proceed,
But I thought this fight I would never succeed.
Down on my knees I fell and prayed to God,
You are the only one who can save me, oh Lord.
I kept praying everyday from dusk till dawn,
And complained why do I keep falling on and on?

One night I had a dream but there was no one in sight,
Suddenly there was thunder and a voice spoke into the light.
It said, “I have come here to help you my son!
For you are as near and dear to me as everyone.
So stand up and face whatever you comes your way,
Remember I am besides you all night and day.”

From that day I feared nothing and felt as if I was reborn,
And I learnt a lesson that life means to move on and on.

“Subah Ho Gayi”

Beautiful Scene – Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani

YouTube link: 

This scene happens just before the halfway point. All the 4 major characters are about to literally and figuratively drift in different directions in life. And this scene depicts this major transition point.

“Oh, I wish I had a more happening life” – Naina’s (Deepika) thought bubble. She is a now medical student and has always been a bright one. Studious, introvert, secluded and never the mischievous kind in her school days. When she bumps into her school mate Aditi (Kalki) one day, she wishes for a different life. Unburdened, free and without pressure like Aditi’s who is planning a trip to Manali with her 2 friends. And she embarks on that trip with the trio.

“I need to conquer the world!” – Bunny’s/Kabir’s (Ranbir) thought bubble. Never a bright student, Bunny was always the leader of the group. His interest is in photography and wants to go to Chicago for a scholarship programme. His dad is supportive but like all bratty children, Bunny rarely warms up to him.

“How I wish Avi knows how much I dig him…” – Aditi’s (Kalki) thought bubble. She is the darling amongst her friends Bunny and Avi but has real serious hots for Avi although only her harmless possessiveness shows up. She never opened up about this and Avi’s flirting with other girls adds to her jealousy. She hails from a rich family so career and getting settled is not much of a problem.

“I drink because my business ventures fail or is it the other way round?” – Avi (Aditya Roy Kapoor). He likes to drink and being aimless in life. He wants Bunny to join in. Betting is a big part of his life and a sad one. He is not smart enough to realize that he does not much luck on his side.

After a night of song and dance during which Naina has finally given up her glasses and geeky dress (that’s what it means to have finally opened up and freed oneself), she is taking a stroll on the now deserted road with Bunny quite late in the night. She has fallen for him even though she knows he is the exactly opposite. Qualities aside, she is a basically a home bound, hermit type and he is drifter and a nomad. She makes the effort but.. Suddenly somewhere from the bushes nearby (???…an awkward scene), Aditi stumbles in. And then Avi shouts at them from a distance. He seems excited and joins them. He asks Bunny why he did not tell that he has a got a scholarship in the US. Naina is surprised and perhaps little dejected. Bunny replies it was surprise for them which he wanted to disclose on this trip. Avi seems pissed off since he had made plans with Bunny to have a gala time ahead. Now Bunny mentions he would be leaving in a week’s time. Avi asks Aditi if Bunny is indeed serious and whether he should go. Aditi already hurt with Avi’s flirtatious behaviour and aimless direction in life, firmly goads Bunny with the decision and disperses after congratulating him. Avi finally says he is happy with whatever Bunny has decided and leaves too.

Meanwhile, Naina who is still an outsider to the group merely watches. She looks at Bunny and declares that he always wanted to roam the world and pursue his dreams wherever they take him. He confesses he has not even told his dad about the travel and also he is afraid now. She is sad and when asked she smirks and declines that she would miss him. She knows she would miss him tons. Circling back to the original discussion, he asks what that which she wanted to tell him was. By now it has already dawned upon her that their paths are different in life. She wants to settle in and he wants to be a wanderer. And to answer his question, she points that it’s already dawn and the morning light has set in. The birds have started chirping and the warm glow of light basks their faces. They seem to have woken up in their lives with this dawn.

It is actually a dawn in all their lives. The college time has ended and so is the fun. A more serious life is waiting. Avi has realized he is on his own and needs something else to proceed in life. Aditi knows she would not be able to make Avi realize of her suppressed love and needs to head back to her family for them to decide what she needs to do in future. Bunny appears very sure about his goals in life and would be heading in that direction now. And as for Naina, her love for him remains unacknowledged. She knows her career in medicine needs her to be on different track as Bunny’s. Even if she communicates her feelings, she knows his love for his dreams would upstage anything else. She has to be step away.

She does. As she walks away from him, she realizes that not all dreams get fulfilled. At least not so soon but she still would carry these memories with her. She smiles from this realization. Meanwhile the town slowly beams to life to welcome a new day.